About Me

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

The Bredherhood - Part I

Ever been to Chowpatty beach, Mumbai? No!
Hmmmmm... okie how about this..
Ever taken the third seat from the right most corner of the last row in a movie hall playing a Mithunda movie!!!!! STILL A NO!!
Well, this post is not for you and neither is this world. My best wishes to you in hanging yourself with the first piece of Silk Smitha's (May her Soul, RIP) used sarees that u may find and let a better voyeur take your place on planet earth.
Yeps, you guessed it right! What holds together the two locations mentioned at the start of this blog, is the ease with which a couple --- (one guy - briefly balding, hopeless out of luck in finding a new date apart from the one who has come with him, aged 28 and helmet-owner;
one female - holding the helmet, hair generally adorned with jasmine, staring hopeless with love/lust at the bald One) --- can be spotted. They come in all kinds and variations with my favourite pair just being described in the brackets above.
Cut the chase! 'THE BREDHERHOOD' strikes!!!! It was on one of those walks to Chowpatty along with my college mates and dear pals - Sandeep, Prashanth, Shashi and Akshay - some of whom had plans of pursuing a summer internship in Mumbai, that we came across the couple.
Minutes after we had perched our butts on the damp sands of Chowpatty, they entered into our line of sight. 10 metres away from us, and acting as our first line of defence against any raging tsunami or an octopus on 'weed', they refused to let go off the tight embrace they were in.
What appeared to be an ENT specialist's job, appeared as being executed by the guy, repeatedly on the woman's E and T. Gross as much as it was, for the lack of nothing more ambitious to do for that hour we continued our watch... with tea in hand from a hawker who had similar plans.
Our 'vision' was disturbed by a pair of punks who drove the couple out of sight by getting within hand shaking distance (i recollect seeing the female's hand shaking out of nervousness) to them.
Well, it was at that point that The Bredherhood was formed, in spirit and soul. We realized that the only way by which we could prevent society from going corrupt, without doing what the Shiv Sena or Bajrang Dal might put up as a business plan, is by becoming active voyeurs. Those young men I mistook for punks, had with their noble and intentional act sent the couple scurrying for cover. The Bredherhood, which Shashi politely refused to join, siting 'personal reasons', was formed!
Our Motto - 'Voyeurism as the means of protecting woman's chastity'. Though we have targetted only one half of the market, success in the short run, might help us upgrade to a newer motto and better tools too perhaps. The Bredherhood has also had branches opened up in two of the major metros of the country - Chennai and Bangalore in that order.
Not a group to be gender biased, (after all, both women and men are at it on the beaches, theatres and classrooms of our country), there have also been women in the Bredherhood. They go with the simple and collective code name - Shishters, just as we are Bredhers. Shishters do not have any function different from ours and the main motto of the Bredherhood; they only do it subtly :-).
So this I guess gets to be our contribution to society.. though not as notorious as the Freemasons or as one-minded as the Stockbrokers, we I'm sure will find our own path and reason for existence in this big bad world.. Do wait for the charter to be published in 'The Bredherhood - II'.
PS: The 'personal reason' for Shashi not joining our group was found out shortly by one of the Bredhers in the Bandra area - he did IT..
Venkata 'Sigona' Suri.

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